HEY HEY....SO YOU WANT TO BE FAMOUS

Just in case you're not cool...the title of this blog is the hook to a B.O.B song. I love Bobby Ray.

But my love for my future baby daddy ...Bobby Ray aka B.O.B is not what this blog is about.

This blog is a reflection on my life...for the past week.

This week I have been a life coach. I the unemployed, out of work, living off savings aspiring actress, producer and writer has been a life coach to beautiful, talented, working actors.

The irony of the situation speaks for itself. I am not complaining. I love my friends and I am happy for all of them. I feel honored that I am the one people call on when they need someone to talk to.

But it does make me think....

The entertainment industry can kill your spirit. It can make you an entirely different person than you set out to be. I know. I've changed. I became someone I didn't much care for. I began drinking to much. I started hanging out with people that normally I wouldn't. I felt myself slowly slipping away. I cared to much about the fame, the names and what the so called "cool" kids were doing. I became one of the "cool" kids. But at what price?

Luckily for me I over think when I am alone. I analyze everything including myself and my future And I didn't like what I saw. So I sat down and prayed. First, I went to God for forgiveness. I asked him to help me make better choices in my life and to guide my path.

So I stopped hanging with certain people. Stopped going out. Started trying to build actual friendships. People who care about me not about the perks that came with the career I chose. Then I was blessed.

With Kenya...a month away from the materialistic society we live in. Time to actually give of myself. To put smiles on children's faces by just doing the simplest of tasks. I worked harder there than I ever have in my life. It was absolutely amazing, challenging and just plain incredible. (also a great diet...lost 12lbs woooohooo)

Now I am back...and I am trying to keep my sanity in an insane world. Trying to have some sense of morality in an industry that is very morally corrupt. Trying not to revert to my former party girl self. The streets are not the place for me. Although I miss my friends. I miss dancing. (I need to find a non hood, non drunk and drug infested place to shake what my momma gave me)

I have fallen short but I am still blessed. I am not ashamed of my past but it's just that PASSED. I've moved on. I will continue to make mistakes, I am human but I pray each mistake brings a new lesson. And each lesson is a blessing.

So you want to be famous...which I completely understand.
Just remember who YOU are before the fame, remember who your REAL friends are.
Some people will latch on on the way up so they may seem like a friend because they were there when there was nothing but in actuality they are just along for the ride.

I've grown up with some incredibly talented people and I have watched them all evolve into who they are today. Some are the same exact people. Some have changed for the better. Some I pray they find who they once were and get reacquainted with that person.(Or perhaps their real personality has emerged)

Don't seek fame. Seek a career. Set goals and work towards those.

In this day in age we are over run by Real Housewives, Basketball Wives, Bad Girls Club, Heidis and Spencers and of course those Kardashians. People who are famous for NO reason. Not talent, no skill, NOTHING. My question is....WHY?

Why want fame so bad that you are willing to let the world into your personal life? You are choosing fame over something else missing in your life?

BE YOU and be proud of who you are.

and now a Word from our sponsor

1 Samuel 16:7
But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

Walmart is Always Hiring

I'm mad. I am upset. I am disappointed but I just can't cry about it. I actually can't feel sad about it.

So, it's been almost a year since my last post. I apologize to all 6 followers of my blog and promise to try and write more. I need to write more in general. My life seems to be falling apart which means I have tons of free time so hey....I will write.

The most recent is the job that was promised to me in April is gone. I find out today that a young lady who I thought was a friend was an associate got the job. Which means she went behind my back and contacted the supervisor while I was out of the country. ( I went to Kenya for a month....promise to blog about that soon) So, after taking a month of my life off to VOLUNTEER, for those of you who don't know volunteer means work for FREE, I am now unemployed. And every production in Atlanta is fully staffed.

Being that it has been a year my last blog I was still actively pursuing a career in front of the camera...that has changed. I have been recently making a living as a production assistant mainly in the costume world. Which if my 2 show experience says anything for the way that world works....I HATE IT. I love the clothes. I love the organized choas when it comes to putting a characters looks and style together. I HATE the politics, the cat fighting, the lying and cheating to look better than your co-worker. (this is probably not going to help me find work)

The weird thing about all this is I don't see myself in another field. I have tried the so called "real world" and it's not the place for me. My place in the world is on a stage. If it's a sound stage, a theater it, location, it doesn't matter. And I don't have to be on it or in front of the camera. I just need to be near it. I need to know that my part in the production no matter how small makes a difference in bringing smiles and entertainment to someone out there.

So now here I am UNEMPLOYED but still blessed. At least I have an idea about where I want to work...and where I don't (costumes). I know a few names that might be able to help me get there...and if not...Walmart's always hiring.

I leave you with an encouraging Word. May God be with you and thank you for reading my rants.

Jeremiah 29:11-14     

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the Lord, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile.